Couple o' tidbits today on topics that don't merit their own full-fledged posting.
Tried out a new face lotion the other day. For me, that involves making very sure my previous one was empty, then proceeding to check the labels of the hundreds of other half-filled bottles of...stuff... in my bathroom until I find one containing the letters, L, O, T, I, and N in some order.
The one I landed on was a Neutrogena product of some sort and when I applied it to the face area, I felt a slight stinging followed by a sensation that BURNED WITH THE HEAT OF ONE THOUSAND SUNS! That's right, folks, applying this particular brand of lotion is akin to dipping your face into a vat full of tacks and porcupines. And it's not nearly as fun as they make it look on Fear Factor.
So I checked the label on it, which was much easier to do with no eyelids, and sure enough, it says right there on the label: Now with the cleansing power of sulfuric acid. Warning: If you feel a burning sensation not unlike swimming in molten lava, please stop using this product. For a while. But when your blisters have healed, come ON back, sucka!
I'm paraphrasing but you get the gist. Apparently, they weren't content with harnessing the useless oils and essences of fruits and vegetables that one would not normally associate with oils and essences unless they subtly hinted that your face would look like you had rubbed it with sandpaper if you didn't use it.
So I came out of the experience a little wiser and a little tinglier.
And speaking of labels, I had a nice chuckle when I discovered the bottle also had an "instructions" section. I didn't actually read them (I've heard you can catch scurvy from reading, and/or listen to, instructions of any kind) but it did remind me to make a mental note to ask why flight attendants feel the need to show you how to operate a seat belt. I figure if you have the intelligence and strength to navigate the behemoth that is the flight booking industry, you can handle a seatbelt.
OK, I know I said there'd be a menagerie of topics but I'm all creatived out. I'll close by saying good luck to the myriad of people vying for the position of Danielynn's father. I've heard good things about the Who's Your Daddy? DNA Testing Service in the Bahamas.
You probably think I'm making that name up.